Beautiful Boy: A Book Review
Beautiful Boy, a father’s journey through his son’s addiction, is my favorite book of all time. I have just finished my fourth re-read, and I felt there was no better book to be my first review than this one. Let me, first, tell you a little bit about what this book means to me. I first read this book during the worst time of my entire life. Although the subject matter is very dense and arguably very dark as well, Sheff’s writing brought a comfort to me. Though most of the book focuses on his relationship to his son and his son’s journey with addiction, he drops little bits of worldly wisdom sprinkled throughout the book that make reading the book an even bigger treat. A couple examples of this include the quotes, “I was a child, but some things you just live with because you cannot go backward” and “There is much good, but to enjoy the beauty, the love, one must bear the painful.” Outside of the strange comfort Sheff’s writing brought me, this book has taught me more about addiction than any other piece of media or textbook ever has. As someone with a family full of addicts to a variety of substances, this book really opened my eyes in a way they weren’t before. Reading this book changed my heart and has led me to learn about addiction in a deeper and more meaningful way. It has allowed me to empathize with those, in my own life and outside of it, who are stricken with addiction. I have since gone on to learn as much as I can in terms of the pitfalls of the addiction recovery industry and helpful things to know like harm-reduction tactics. Without this work, I would still be oblivious to the true struggle the addicted face, so I owe Sheff greatly when it comes to that.
Now that I’ve touched on my own experience with this book, let’s talk a little bit about the book itself. Beautiful Boy is a book written by David Sheff, the father of Nic Sheff. The memoir is written first-hand from David’s account of his son’s addiction. He goes through Nic’s entire life. He paints a vivid picture of Nic’s childhood and adolescence. He then goes on to recount his son’s entire journey with addiction and sobriety and the ways in which it affected himself, his wife and other children, and Nic as well to some extent. Sheff’s writing is addicting and every word feels intentional and thought out. The book offers a lot of personal information and is beyond vulnerable, but the book is also largely factual and quotes from experts Sheff interviewed.
What makes the book so great? For starters, the book is so well researched. It has a very informational side, but it never feels boring. The information Sheff includes throughout the book and even in the afterword can inform and change minds about addiction and get people on board with the idea that it is a disease and not a short-coming. The book also recounts Sheff’s own experience and offers some advice for people who have a loved one dealing with addiction. This book can serve as a kind of realistic bible for those in similar situations and help to make one dealing with a situation like this one feel less alone.
Outside of the more factual or tangible reasons like how this book can provide advice or facts to people dealing with or trying to learn about addiction, it is an incredibly touching story. The factual aspects are all fantastic, but I would say for those of us more so on the outside of addiction, the real empathy and change of heart towards the addiction epidemic and those inflicted with it, is the picture Sheff paints of his own son’s story. It is not possible to read this book and not grow to feel for Nic and to empathize with what Sheff is recounting. Sheff is so vulnerable in his story telling and emotional recounts that it is impossible to not open your heart to Nic’s story and thus open your heart to the endless stories of addicts and their loved ones. It paints an incredibly clear picture of how those inflicted with addiction can be so smart, so kind, so wonderful and still struggle with such a horrible disease. This is such a different and necessary message opposed to the one we are often fed about addicts.
This book will open your heart and mind towards learning about addiction. You will feel for addicts and their loved ones in a way you have not before. Sheff paints a heartbreakingly beautiful image of his beloved son and the fear and pain and love and empathy that comes with loving an addict. Once you read this book, you will stop to truly empathize with addicts and their families in a way you couldn’t before unless you had experienced it.
Everyone I have ever recruited to read this book I love so dearly, has loved it in the same way I do. It is a heavy read and very dense, but it will change the way you look at the world around you and open your heart. A quote sequence that somewhat summarizes Sheff’s experience is as follows: “ …my beloved son, my beautiful boy. Fortunately there is a beautiful boy. Unfortunately, he has a terrible disease. Fortunately there is love and joy. Unfortunately there is pain and misery. Fortunately the story is not over.” The truth is, no matter what I say or write about this brilliant book, I will never do it justice. If you ever take my advice on anything, it should be to read this book. If you are worried the ending will be the worst you can imagine, Nic has been sober for many years. I don’t say this to diminish his struggle with addiction or their family’s story, but I wanted to know things were “okay” before I read something so heavy on my first read as well. Although the book can be considered “sad” I think of it as more so extremely emotional and eye-opening. Please, if you can, give this one a read; you won’t regret it.